The Top 20 Problems with ‘Suicide Squad’

“Suicide Squad” has all sorts of problems—from the rumored reshoots to the six-week crafted script. These are but 20 in the almost unwatchable piece of work that is “Suicide Squad.”

David Ayer is a solid storyteller. It’s a shame the studio put a stranglehold on his dark and dirty directorial style, previously on display in his intensely competent and entertaining “Sabotage,” “End of Watch,” and “Fury.”

But “Suicide Squad” is not his movie. It’s Warner Bros.’s attempt to reheat McMarvel’s grub from “Guardians of the Galaxy.”

And it tastes like crap.

1

The very first second

From the moment “Suicide Squad” opens, the score sounds like a single-shooter video game, and a rushed one that misses the target entirely. In fairness, the target is an ever-moving one.

2

The ‘Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice’ flyover flashback

Batman v Superman Funeral

In Amanda Waller’s explanatory voiceover, we hear that “BvS” and “SS” are connected. Sounds about right. So quit shoving superfluous stuff on the screen, particularly when it’s cut from another movie.

3

Deadshot’s dead weight

It’s the first of two introduction reintroductions (see number five below). Deadshot’s second makes the first unnecessary. This is where the editor needs an intro.

4

The Batman cameo(s)

Batman’s burst on the scene feels cheap and forced. And there’s that video-game score again.

5 and 6

Harley Quinn’s return and the Joker’s relegation

5. Like Deadshot, we already met Margot Robbie’s bat-wielding babe once. This next vignette, like Deadshot’s second, is better, so then why not cut the first?

6. The most iconic villain of all time, now played by Oscar-winner Jared Leto, is revealed in a voiceover for his sidekick. Laughable.

7

The Slipknot surprise

Slipknot Waller Suicide Squad

Wait, who is that second to the left of Amanda Waller? In the Pentagon war-room scene, another member of the Suicide Squad—not featured in the previous two introduction sequences—now mysteriously accompanies the antiheroes.

8

Oh brother

Enchantress Brother Suicide Squad

Enchantress’s demonic-spirit brother is in some ancient artifact just sitting on a bookshelf? How did Waller get her security clearance again?

9

A ‘World’ of problems

Suicide Squad World

Why is “World” capitalized?

10

Stopping the Suicide Squad

SUICIDE SQUAD

If the Suicide Squad is needed to take on the many threats in a post-Superman world—notice “world” is lowercased there—why is their first threat a member of the Suicide Squad?

11

Slipknot says hi…

Slipknot Suicide Squad

There’s that blur(b) of a mystery man again. His background: “Here comes Slipknot, the man that can climb anything.” And yet his character is barely allowed to get off the ground.

12

…and goodbye

So that’s why he’s included: to be made an example of. But wouldn’t an intro, like the others,’ have made his early death more impactful?

13

Harley Quinn’s elevator rise (to yet another fall)

“Suicide Squad” tries to get tonally tense only to cut to K7’s “Come Baby Come” in another forced fight with no feeling. Come on.

14

Wait, what? Waller?

Amanda Waller Suicide Squad

The Suicide Squad’s mission is to save Amanda Waller? So Waller creates the Suicide Squad, which turns out to be the enemy, which then has to save Waller, who created the Suicide Squad, which turns out to be the enemy, which then has to save Waller, who….

15

The bar backstory

Diablo Suicide Squad

With the climax approaching, another poor pace change is poured, this one giving Diablo his due. There is little reason to care for this lesser-known character and actor, but we’re told to in the film’s final 30 minutes.

16

Enchantress’s dancing

Sweet fancy Moses.

17 and 18

The body double

17. Rick Flagg’s Deadshot hug is dead wrong (1:55 in the above clip). The stoic soldier is now an emo enlistee?

18. And then there’s Enchantress’s below-the-belt dare. Just listen for yourself (at the 2:30 mark). Ballsy.

19

Private Joker

Suicide Squad Joker

The previous Joker was masked in secrets and subtleties. This one took time to stencil his name on a suit.

20

It’s a Wonder

Wonder Woman

Who needs the Suicide Squad when Wonder Woman is around? And yet, she’s never seen nor mentioned. But maybe that’s a good thing. This movie could’ve been career and character suicide.

1 out of 5

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